I am fairly terrible at saying goodbye's - specially to people i love. "Replacement therapy" is my tactic. i "replace" the sadness with some other highly inappropriate trademarks of mine - humour, sarcasm or plain obliviousnessness.
Sunday i had to say goodbye to someone... something i had been dreading since a long time. Goodbyes are temporary things i feel.. cos the person never really goes away.. he just makes the transition from the physical world to the little one inside my head, where things are more fun anyway. Heck, Roger Fedrer is my neighbour for cryin out loud! I managed miserably cracking some strange (im sorry) jokes about haircuts, gym, flab tyres and what not.
So this goodbye was accompanied by a beautiful drive through the rain. Just what the doctor ordered. "Give these part-ees one rainsoaked ferociously beautiful day" rain for me and Sun for him. (alas, he's a sunshine person)
Also, this innate ability to say "Im ok" with a facefull of tears is something im trying to overcome. but c'mon d'you really expect me to say "No i'm not you big galoot, im miserable, dont go ill die without you, who'll do thisnthat (make quotes about kind thoughtful actions performed by the individual) for me", accompanied by more bawls? come to think of it, it might actually help. must try next time. maybe gifts will accompany. men are gullible anyway. slightest sign of tears and theyre thinking "whatdoidowhatdoido, i swear i dint mean it, its all my fault, your pretty" etc. heh heh
Its the persons fault anyway. the going away-er is the one to blame. who asked them to decide to make their life millions and millions of miles away when all they've ever needed is right here? why should the stay-back-er have to bear this unpallitative painlessness that separation brings? lol.
Apparently, distance makes the hearts grow fonder.