That describes most of us i would say. Much as we deny having a complex entwined existence, thats what we are and what our lives are. COMPLEX. A mish mash of feelings, people, relationships, decisions, places, objectives, sentiments and much much more. heck even our confusion is complicated. At any point of time in life it always seems that there are so many loose ends to tie up, so many wires to unentangle, so many hearts to unbreak and wrong words to unsay that its overwhelming. ok maybe your life isnt like that, dont go leave me a comment refuting this aggressively.
In the pursuit of simplicity - is what ive always been. Trying to compartmentalise my life and assign each problem its due significance is something ive been trying to do since forever. But earlier theories of acheiving simplicity seems to be getting in the way now - which i would'nt want to elaborate on now. not only for the sheer naivete of it, but also sometimes i fear i reveal too much about myself on these posts!
So what do you do when you suddenly decide to dissociate? how do you go about it? what if u suddenly reach a point when you just dont feel the need to sort out a miniscule non issue beyond a few minutes, or hassle yourself with tiny little things people say or do that would ordinarily hurt, but are a non entity now. Assume a new "dissociated avatar"? in my opinion, the above sounds ideal - where do we have the time to delve into little little things now - life is too short to be anythign but happy. yet, in the web of relationships we live in, we cannot afford to be "dissociated" or "neutral" or "unruffled" or any other non controversial state of mind, for fear of being mistaken as "not caring anymore" or " selfish" or plain "loony" [which is somethign i totally dont mind being btw, and maybe lots of people will agree" :) ]
Simplicity also has one more drawback - you end up nursing a broken heart - simply because you were foolish enough to believe love is meant to be loved foolishly, unconditionally, completely, and committedly.
No one told you love also has its set of rules, that there are games to play, a list of the right and wrong things to be said, and a boundary beyond which you must'nt dare venture.. thats the point of no return.. the point where the person is officially engraved into your heart and its no longer an ordinary love.
I think this world has to stop being so judgemental, angry, complex and entwined. Maybe we all can find some peace of mind, god knows we all need it.
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