Thursday, August 30, 2007

A Zillion things i hate

Its only fair to have a "things I hate" post when I have a "things I absolutely love post". So here goes.. :) (it's back to bullet points!.. havent used them in many posts now)
  • Liars. I can stand the truth, however hard it may be. If you lie to me, not only do you tell me that you don't love me enough, that u can look me in the eye and lie, but also that u think I'm not strong enough to tell me the truth.
  • Hypocrites. I'm ok with people calling me a bitch, or any other adjectives they find suitable but to MY FACE! I can't deal with finding out someone whose sugary sweet to me on my face is calling me names behind my back. Its juvenile, cheap and means you dont have as much courage as I do.
  • People who eat the top triangular tip of my samosa. geez, I save it for last people and u come yank it off and eat it?
  • People who say "hai ram kitna weight put on kiya hai". I feel like saying " really I wouldn't know if 378694656 of y'all wouldnt have told me" . geez
  • Bad hair days. its unbelievable how moronic u can look!
  • Being home sick. (which I'm doing right now btw) it makes me write stupid posts (hehe) get exhausted taking a bath and lethargic, something I HATE feeling.
  • Slapstick comedy. I prefer witty/situational comedies.
  • The great suburb/south Mumbai divide. I've had endless debates over it ALL my life. and had to pass roadblocks people set up already, assuming I'm going to be a horrible snob/rich spoilt kid/arrogant egomaniac, ALL of which I'M NOT. but I've had to prove it, nonetheless.
  • Confessions of a shopaholics. the book. it left such a bad taste in my mouth, that I've read 3 BRILLIANT books after, and only now can I say its off my mind. (why do people buy/write such stuff anyway?)
  • People who dont spell my name with a capital letter. This little punctuation phobia, courtesy English teacher in school.
  • Partially wet toes/body. I dont mind being soaked or bone dry. damp is just in between and not very nice.
  • Twilight. not that I like darkness too much, but twilight I HATE. its too depressing.
  • My computer at home. I think it thinks its from the seventies. I need a new one.
  • People who spit/urinate/litter the streets. Where's our civic sense? Are we really that crass that godly figure heads have to be painted on walls to keep us from peeing?!
  • People who think women cant play sports/drive a car. I take special pride in making some sorry ass male chauvnist pig eat his words.
  • Women drivers. hehehe most of them cant reverse. someones gonna kill me for this one fer sure.
  • Men who hit on you with some seedy dialogue and think they're hot stuff!
  • Waiting. for anything. except maybe love.
  • People who love me too much. I hurt people, I always do.
  • Unclean desks. I swear, I could clean clean clean stuff and get a huge kick out of it. I'm beginning to sound more and more hormonal with each bullet aren't I?
  • (Most) Politicians. I shall end this one here.
  • Murphy's law. mailto:#$%%$&#*&@!#%&(^$
  • Overly aggresive people. if people are being nice, why don't u try the same? it might work u know.
  • Women who lose it after a break up. most of them think he wasnt worth it after, but then make a wreck outta themselves anyway.
  • People who dont get the concept of "space".
  • (diam, most of the things I hate r some form of people. geez, shall try focussing on "stuff")
  • South Bombay aunties who "size" you up in the elevator. I'm sorry, but how exactly do you raise your left hand with that (uggh) (boulder sized) ring on it?
  • Cats. (I'm tempted to say dogs too, but at least they look cute in pictures)
  • Falling sick. for a person who hates it, I sure do that a lot :(
  • Long distance relationships. dont be fooled by how late in the bullets this came. I LOATHE DETEST ABHOR HATE (for lack of more adjectives signifying "hate") long distance relationships.
  • Carbs. biatch. they just find their way to your butt.
  • Things I hate lists. do we really need to know what you hate? or I hate? errr..

On that note, over and out. im gonna get back to.. err.. doing nothing. as being sick means I get tired at the drop of a hat, can't watch much tv, am done reading 2 GREAT books have just written a blog post (which I think in hindsight, I'lll delete later as a "what was I thinking when I put this crap up" post.) lol. cya!

Monday, August 27, 2007

Notes to myself # 1

“I cant “Make my mark” for all time - those concepts are mutually exclusive. “Lasting effect” is in itself a self contradictory term. Meaning does not exist in the future and neither do I. Nothing I see will have meaning “ultimately”. Nothing will mean tomorrow what it meant today. Meaning changes with the context. My meaningfulness is here. Its enough that I am of some comfort to someone today. It’s enough that I make a difference now”. - Hugh Prather “Notes to myself”

A book I feel any one us could write. Its simple, yet complex. Each paragraph can get me thinking for days on end. This one for instance, Ive been thinking about since a while now

It answers so many things - referring to my “And now forever's come and gone” post… Its like that’s exactly what I was trying to say.. forever is contextual, conditional and finite. Infinity of mind and heart, love much more than a token.. understood yet unspoken. Poetic babble. After all, a poem/story on REAL life with its time bound love finite infinity wouldn’t really get you teary eyed would it?

I like the way it ends - “Its enough that i make a difference NOW”. Finite as the boundaries seem, contextual as the words maybe it’s the “Now” that’s forever. When I look at someone who used to be a BIG part of my life and see a stranger, I no longer yearn for what we had, the friendship we shared or for the same look in their eyes. Because that was Then, and this is NOW. Instead, I have in my mind a replay of my favorite memory with that person, or the one sentence they’ve said to me ill always remember, and a smile creeps up to my face. No ne can take that away! Someone (random article in paper) had once said that some thoughts seem limitless in the mind and when said out aloud, seem to shrink into triviality. i beg to differ, revisiting old memories filefoldered away in your mind makes them larger than life and what does shrink in fact the physical realm... the actual "now" cos it feels like "then" and a scale change of time - 1second of real time = an hour of past time in fact, does not in fact shrink thoughts! [Now all i need to do is get a hold of who wrote that and give him/her a piece of my mind :)]

No boundaries, time limits or contextuality will ever take that away. The vividness of some memories is enough to be “forever” in the true sense of the term. I can remember to alarming detail certain memories which I hold dear to me… I remember the time the place the look in the persons eye, the curve of the smile, the vulnerability of the face, the trace of the fingers.. things which have happened 3-4-5-7 years ago even. And I have a feeling always will.

So something’s forever - the memories, that dull ache in your heart and stomach when you see that so-close-yet-so so far person, that place in your mind which safely stores these memories to pull out when your missing someone, or just feel like your losing faith in “forever”. Look inside, go back in time, go to your favorite memory, your greatest hug, your favorite person, the one you cried for most, the one who made you laugh the most, the one you think you’ll always yearn for, the look in your grannies eyes when you leap into her lap, your first kiss, first dance in the rain, ( clearly, I could go on) and you’ll find forever. Right there.

Friday, August 17, 2007

They're ready for their new homes!!

Aww!!!!! not that im a big dog lover, but these pups are ADORABLE! if anyone thinks they can find them a home, pls call on the numbers mentioned! (No, they r not mine, this picture was taken outside a store )

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

(Happy) Independance day

I thought id get arrested taking these pictures at Dadar station. lol!! This is the platform for the trains going to town (Churchgate) at around 9.25in the morning which essentially still qualifies as peak time, though 8.30 -9.00 is the "peakest" time.

Happy Independance day?

Its strange that most of our architectural wonders, heritage buildings, (Army Navy bldg, Fort, VT terminus) are built by the British. Also our Rail/Postal services were set up by them too.

Before i sound like im on "their" side, im not. I only think that they left us with a lot of good infrastructure, architecture and fundamental layouts.

Coming back to Happy Independance day. I wonder how many of us value what it means, how many of us truly would die for our country if the need ever arose, how many of us actually sing the national anthem when it plays before the start of a movie ( i do, and have been laughed at many a time). The other day i happened to make plans with a friend for wednesday night, just to catch up it hd been a while. A minute into the discussion as to wher we should go had him hit his hand on his head and say "oh shit its a dry day i think". No offence or anythign, but this is a reaction i would expect from most people (who like to drink i.e.). BUt the larger picture is that its our Independance day! Its the day India opened her eyes and brought to the world the first glimpse of the soon to be largest democracy. 60 yrs on, it stil persists. Much to the chagrin of all the people and world leaders who thought democracy would die with Nehru .

Indian democracy will always find someone. Not that i have much faith n the current set of politicians/leaders/government officers/anybody in power for that matter. Neither do i have faith in the poor gullible uneducated janta who gets swayed by some starry promises of regularising slums built beyond 1996 so that they get to keep their homes, or regular supplies of water, or buying farm land at a price that ia reasonable and just, or other such castles in the sky promised by filthy money laudering vite grabbing politicians. Ill commend the stupidity of their actions though, after all, being stupid to such extremes is also an art.

What im talking about is a yr ago or 2 was it? Mr Karunanidhi gave away 25,000 color tv's as part of the campaign promise. Now i can think of a hundred other places the money couldve been used but then im sure color tv's were more important right?

At least democracy ensures that we get to choose our own idiots.

Monday, August 13, 2007

And now forever's come and gone..

Friday night. 12.00 a.m. home. coldplay singing. Theres something about not going to a party and staying home with music and a book to keep you company that made me not go to a party, stay home with music and a book to keep me company. Right now coldplays saying "Nobody said it would it would be easy, nobody said it would be so hard, I'm going back to the start". i think these guys are singing to me.Of all the talents i don't have, i wish i could sing. dammit.

This blog's going nowhere I'm tellin you now, so u might as well stop reading. don't say i dint warn ya. saw Rush hour 3 some time back. HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT. Chris Tucker is a gangsta dude!

Am i strange that some music makes me melancholy? i was in this gigantic happy mood sometime back cos i met a very dear friend, watched a fun film, discovered i could say "Mutual funds are subject to market risks, please read the offer document carefully before investing" nearly as fast as they say it in the advertisements. yep. i got an alternate career option baby! Voice overs here i come :)

Suddenly my mood seems to have switched stations. Women have this strange tendency to be able to vacillate between highs and lows in a matter of seconds. right now I'm thinking of everything that's wrong with my life and what not.Was thinking about the word "forever" for a while. how many times Ive been told we'd be friends "forever" or he/she'd love me "forever" or you'll "always" be special to me. its funny how this seemingly infinite time frame comes with an outer limit. comes and goes.. it doesn't stay forever.. in hindsight, of all the people who told me they'd love me "forever" there are less than a handful that are still in my life - or is it just that "forever" is circumstantial.ill love you "forever" as long as i think we might have a future, or we'll be friends "forever" i.e. until we both find someone better? i dint make this mistake. I'm too much of a realist to have told anybody that I'd "anything" them "forever" .

Not that i don't like meeting people or making new friends - its inbuilt in my system to do so. but there's something about an old friend or someone/something you've been in love with that i just wanna go back to sometimes - go back to an old photograph, get inside, hold the person and not let go. How many places are bookmarked with a memory so surreal, that u almost revisit it every time u sit in that chair, or that rock near the sea or that theatre.. how many songs are entwined with the people they remind you of..

So if the "forever" people aren't there anymore, how do you shrug the rest of the things off?

Friday, August 10, 2007

Stop growing up!!!!

Among a few things bugging me right now - last night on my very enthusiastic attempt to return-to-gym-regularly I saw a little boy working out. Getting all agitated over what a kid that small is doing his gym I went and asked him how old he is. Turns out he is 13. must be about four foot something tall and one of those extremely chubby boys whose cheeks you want to pull. This kid was doing weights, like an adult with gym gloves and what not. I actually went and told him he shouldn’t be working out and playing instead. And I got a very affected “im grown up now, and I need to lose weight and tone up” response.

What really bugged me was that kids today are entering all the spectra of life which should infact be occupied only by adults. A month ago there was an article in the paper speaking (very proudly) about a new beauty salon for kid’s aged up to 12/15 im not sure. This salon has posh facilities and does all the services a regular parlor would do - blow drying hair, streaking, wash, haircuts etc.

Just what we needed. Kids to start obsessing about straightening their hair and getting David Beckham hair cuts from age 6. As if Television hadn’t caused enough damage.

Also, you enter places like Polly Esther (which used to be my FAV Fri. night place cos they played retro) or RA or Red Light and its full of these 15-17 something year old girls and boys dressed like they’re 25 smoking and drinking. The advice I want to give them I wont mention here cos it would make me sound like a complete aunty. No offence to any aunties :)

As a kid I remember racing out of the house the minute I had any free time. TV according to me was a waste of time, not a luxury. Between school, sports and reading books I dint have time for much else. Fast forward to today - I have a sibling many years younger, and it worries me that kids as old as 6-8 years old have their own ipod’s in my building. Recently one girl threw her birthday party in the Eros Mini theatre. Her back presents were DVD’s. Seriously. They aren’t kids anymore - they’re little adults.
I hate that. I enjoyed being a kid well into my teens and still very proudly preserve large parts of it. Its some thing I told my brother - u have all your life to be an adult, but only these few years to be a kid! Don’t hasten the process.

The last straw came when we were at a family outing at the club, and I happen to love the swings there - always have. So I tell my brother well go sit and he looks at me incredulously and says “Tai, im not a kid anymore” like I had asked him the most absurd thing. My heart broke right there. A) for all the reasons ive listed above and B) I dint ever want my baby brother to grow up. He’s 14 now, and I insist on treating him like he’s 9. Now he’s begun to be ok with it only cos he get’s so many freebies. Poor me. :(

Anyway - to shift from the topic and since the venting is done with - I suffered a HUGE blow to my ego last night which I must put down here only so that the public acceptance/embarrassment will motivate me to set things right. Since a gap of 2 months at gym last night I had a horrible time getting through my workout - had to reduce reps and poundage and felt utterly disappointed. There was a time when people would envy my workout. Last night was horrible. And the weighing scale says +2. :( Result of my own actions no doubt.
So here it is - exactly 3 months from today, on the 10th of Nov is when I have to post back and I have to have gained what I think in my mind is my form and exceeded my previous workout limits. The “Else” part of this statement I can’t come up with.

Think last night and writing about it now is inspiration enough.

Sunday, August 5, 2007


Aksa beach. 31st Dec 2006.Lucky shot with cellphone. 4.39 p.m. As close to the horizon as i could get.