Tuesday, November 2, 2010


Its a desi thing. Coming to terms with being a whole new city with different morals and attitudes and adjusting can be difficult; I understand. Trying to adjust, finding a comfortable place with your differing accent, dressing maybe and overall value system, also unnerving I guess.

What I dont understand is being in the age bracket of 25-30 years, in business school carrying age old complexities of an inferiority/superiority complex, judgement issues, masks and an overall intricate web of overlapping masks and alternating behaviour. Shouldnt we all be in that age where we've all proven ourselves, academically and professionally in some ways or the other, to be well settled in our accomplishments and confident in our skin? I have reached a climax of feeling frustrated with the 'desi' junta in my batch. FOB's if you may (fresh off the boat). All of them seem saddled with overwhelming complexes in some form or the other manifesting in various forms such as judging others, a certain amount of concealing of facts, undermining or overstating oneself and most of all - jealousy.

I'm thankful for my upbringing when faced in a situation like this - I compete with myself. I'm well aware that I dont want an IB jor or corp finance like most of the others so competing with them is pointless innit? Talking about completion of homework or constant status of studying in a comparative scale is something I neither have the time nor the inclination to do. Im comfortable enough to have worn a churidar kurta to school on a few occasions when there was no special day (and gotten a lot of compliments!!), comfortable enough not to roll my r's since I dont anyway, admit that this was my first Halloween and ask questions about traditions and customs here in the US without pretending Ive lived here forever Cause I HAVENT!

Im finally at a crescendo of wanting to not associate with such narrow minded intensely competitive set of people, Im here to make friends, have fun, study, work and open my mind to new perspectives NOT to carry with me all the petty ridiculousness that I left behind when I was 20. No Offence to anyone, but Im just too busy making the most of every day of these two years of my life that I JUST.DONT.HAVE.TIME.FOR.BULLSHIT.

Being pretty good at ignoring people I dont like being one of the things I do well, I succeed decently in this effort, but then there are days, like today. Things so miniscule that my blog would be mad at me if I ranted about them. This mood certainly wasnt good at the botched attempt at Palak daal, and aaloo sabji. Luckily I have an Oreo cookie chocolate chip whipped cream frosted cupcake to cheer me up. AH. just the thing!