Been thinking about it for a long time. The kind of man I've always wanted to end up with, the kind of man I've been saving up for... He's a combination of perfect and not so perfect, sweet but a little rough around the edges, caring but a bit reserved with himself, in love with me, but not enough that I know confidently he'd be miserable without me...
Some must have's - Stubble.. but just about, the trace of a manly scent, whiffs making me try to guess the brand, and forget for a moment where i am. A strong, assertive, elegant watch that just peeks out from below the cuff, one Ill notice during some casual gestures made whilst speaking. A dimple - one that plays hide and seek, one that ill keep mentally longing to see...
He's attractive, but he need'nt be conventionally handsome, im not one for convention. He's athletic and would cancel on a date with me cos he wouldnt want to miss gym. I would TOTALLY be ok with that. in fact secretly I'd be pleased. He's romantic, but just in the right amounts. Men tend to get totally besotted with a woman sometimes and act completely embarassingly kooky. He doesnt put up with too many of my erratic moods, just when he knows he needs to. Men who cant stand up for themselevs and go weak kneeed around the woman they love are completely unattractive.
He can walk into a room with just an arm on my waist and completely own me, with just that one hand placed assertively on the small of my back, everyone will know where my heart is, and whose his belongs to. He drinks single malt scotch and enjoys his drink, one sip at a time... not too little, not one too much. Getting drunk will make me look bad too, he knows.
He is a kid at heart, one that i can crack absolutely ridiculous jokes with and laugh for no real reason. I let go, i let go of that completely in control, self-preservatory me and let myself be me again...just for a moment let me try. It feels nice, to depend.
He likes my family and loves them like his own - my dad enjoys a drink with him. They feel it too - that aura of assurance, love and protectiveness he bestows on me.
He sounds just perfect. But he isnt... he's cranky sometimes and irrational, and a little too nice. But thats where I come in. Me with my sensible-all-rational approach to life. Ill compensate by having that conversation with him - the one about why we cant make all our decisions with our heart - the lessons Ive learnt the hard way.
And he cant iron clothes. he's good at dishes, but hes bad at ironing clothes. "Ill cook" he says. Ah well. Its endearing, the strange aversion to ironing clothes.
Hard to find such a guy i hear you say. I've heard that all my life. I live in a bubble, rose tinted glasses, cinderella stories dont exist, been there heard that.
I'll have the last laugh on this one, i hear myself say. This guys just gonna pop off a plane and be mine, simple as that.